When life brings you to the brink of goodbye, lean on your journal writing to give you strength for the passage.
It is not easy to say goodbye, is it? Most of the time, anyway. It’s painful to cut the ties, to utter the decisive words, to take one long last look.
It doesn’t really matter what you’re saying goodbye to. The reality, the finality of it is what matters. When you say goodbye, it’s the end.
The end of a relationship, or a duty, or a bad habit. The end of youth or an experience or a fear. The end of something, whatever. The end.
We tend to prefer beginnings. Ends seem like deaths, and that’s scary.
Take it to your journal.
- What is ending for me now? What process, relationship, belief, habit, delusion is now past its prime, past its usefulness, ready to end for me?
- What parts of ending seem negative to me? What is it about ending that is scary or sad?
- What could possibly be positive about ending, especially in terms of the thing that is currently ending in my life?
Some of us run away from saying goodbye. We’ll do anything to avoid it. And then we’ll spend lots of time reflecting on that choice.
Accepting our experience as something that is in constant flow, continuously saying hello and goodbye in an uninterrupted stream, is a cognitive recognition that has to happen before we can feel okay with saying goodbye.
The idea may seem ugly to you, that life is a series of attachments that form and dissolve. But as you look over your past, isn’t that the way of it?
Ask your Inner Coach, that constant friend who lives in your journaling:
- Exactly why is it necessary for me to say goodbye in this instance?
- How can I most happily and comfortably (for the long term!) deal with saying goodbye right now?
- What kinds of hellos may I possibly meet once I say this goodbye?
- How could this transition shape my overall development as a person?
- In what ways can I appreciate this thing that I’m saying goodbye to? How can I say thank you to it?
Let a little time go by. Re-read these journal entries. Do you believe your statements? Has your voice been honest?
If yes, you know what to do. If no, you must start again and answer the questions more honestly.
We are such sentimental creatures! We do not like to let go. But when we learn, through our journaling, that saying goodbye can be a fulfillment more than a loss, we can come closer to the awesome divinity that we naturally are.